Can you say...Paranoid?

I just want to let you all know that Jenny (me) is highly paranoid. Just making sure that if I flinch when you are behind me or I turn around and do a ninja pose at you, I am just pretending. Ok maybe not. I'm that paranoid that I think you are going to poke me in my sides, or slap me, or just plain scare me. So don't be offended. I still love you. I'm just scared of you. :P

Some proof of my paranoidity..... I have a few stories.

Story #1: It's called.. He's there. The Phantom of the Opera...

So I'm in the shower and I'm listening to the Phantom of the Opera cd. (just a heads up.)

Ok. I'm out of the shower now, and I'm wiping down the foggy mirror and exactly at that moment the song is saying, ♫ Look at your face in the mirror.. I am there inside. ♫
So I'm looking in the mirror and I swear I see the phantom's face. It was almost the scariest moment of my life. So I brush it off fairly quickly...but I'm still a little frightened inside. I'm drying my hair and I hear a knock on the door. ( My parents are asleep upstairs along with Maggie and Erin and Ann are both gone. So I'm alone downstairs. FYI.) So I shut off the hair dryer and I hear,"Jenny. Come on. I need to get in the bathroom." It sounds like Erin, but she's not home. So I think, "Jenny. You're just hearing weird stuff. I mean you already saw Phantom's face in the mirror. You're just crazy. Calm down." So I'm like ok. I'm fine. Then I hear it again. "Jenny! Get out of the bathroom! You've been in there for forever!" By this time I'm a little freaked out. So I actually go to the door and listen. "Ok. No one is there. Jenny, you're just scared. It's fine." On the inside I'm totally chill about it. But on the outside, I'm like "GAH! What is happening!" So I get the guts to open the door and look outside. Creak..... "Erin? Ann?..... (no answer) ....ok. No one is there." ( Yes I really did talk to myself.) I shut the door and lock it. I'm really scared now. I'm like looking around for ghosts, or a person in the shower behind the curtain....yeah paranoid I know. So then I hear it one last time. "Jenny! Get out of the bathroom!" It's like a yell. I swear someone was doing it. I'm so scared, I leave all of my stuff in the bathroom, including my computer and towel and stuff. I inch my way toward the door. I slowly unlock it. I turn the handle. I take a quick peek..."Is anyone there?...ok.... 1....2....3!" I bolt through the door, shutting off the light and run to my room. I slam the door, hop into my bed and hide under the covers. An hour later...Ann comes into our room and says, "Jenny? Why didn't you clean up the bathroom?" I'm huddling in my covers and I'm shaking. She looks at me and is like, "Jenny? Are you okay?" I'm like, "HECK NO! Ann! The Phantom of the Opera was outside the door and was going to come in and hang me in the bathroom." Gall. It was so scary. But the funny thing is that I REALLY THOUGHT THAT THE PHANTOM OF THE OPERA WAS OUTSIDE MY BATHROOM DOOR! Silly Jenny. Wow. That is one of my favorite stories to tell to people. The End. True Story. Ask Ann, or Aubrey.

Story #2: I call it The curse of the Poisonous Fruit Snack.

Explanation first. I watch a lot of Monk and Psych. So like poison stuff, and stabbing, and guns and creepy stuff like that. So that is the main reason of my paranoia.


I'm watching Monk in my room and all of the sudden I am craving a snack. So I go upstairs and look in the cupboard for something to eat. Fruitsnacks is what I ended up eating. I am also a tad bit CDO (OCD) , so I dump them out and arrange them by color. Then by amount. They were dinosaur fruitsnacks and there was one that looked like a sun. Just like the picture below.

Anyway, I get really suspicious and I taste a little ray thing of it and it tastes interesting. So of course being me, My mind goes crazy and starts thinking (this is what I really thought.)

"Oh my gosh. It's poisoned. Someone tried to poison me. They knew I would grab a handful of fruitsnacks and they poisoned one. To kill me." So I threw it away and never ate it. And I washed out my mouth just in case the tiny piece I ate had a little poison in it. True Story. I am so lame.

You are probably thinking, "Jenny you are so stupid." or "Wow Jenny. You're that gullible?" I know. You can't believe you're friends with me. I can't believe it either. Just laugh and say those things. Cause I totally agree. But that's really how paranoid I am.

Thanks for listening. Please laugh!